News

Sarsfields Newsletter

November 8, 2018

15-1-2008

THE SASH

 

The Weekly Online Newsletter of Sarsfields GAA Club

 

Juvenile AGM

 

 Saesfields Juvenile A.G.M. will take place on Saturday 26th of January at 7.00pm. Any motions or nominations can be forwarded on to Juvenile Chairman Tony McConnell  tmaconnel@hotmail.com or Padraig Scully. pdrigscully@eircom.net
As teams begin preparing for the new season would all mentors please forward the following details:
1 When their team are recommencing training. 
2. What time and day they intend training.
The new club Secretary Brendan Ryan requires this information for pitch allocation.  Coach coordinator Michael O Sullivan also requires this information so that he can observe training sessions and discuss your teams’ plans for the year
.

Leinster GAA News
 

PRESS RELEASE
Wednesday 9th January 2008


The GAA Museum is pleased to announce a night of special floodlit tours of
Croke Park Stadium before the start of the upcoming games season. These floodlit tours will take place on the evening of Thursday 17th January 2008. There are four floodlit tours to choose from, 6.45pm, 7.00pm, 7.15pm and 7.30pm.

In 2006 Croke Park inaugurated a landmark year of improvements, part of which was the installation of 327 floodlights along the Cusack Stand and Hogan
Stand as well as a demountable pylon on Hill 16. These lightweight
floodlights were designed to fulfil requirements to the highest international standards. The installation was completed in early 2007 in time for the
opening match in the Allianz National Football League between Dublin and Tyrone on Saturday 3rd February. On this historic occasion 81,678 GAA fans poured through the Croke Park turnstiles to witness the switching on of the floodlights ensuring that Croke Park held the honour that weekend of having the largest attendance at a sporting event in the world.

On the 16th September 2007 Croke Park Stadium welcomed over 400 people onto
floodlit tours in conjunction with Dublin Culture Night. Due to unprecedented demand for these tours the GAA Museum has once again decided to open its doors to the spectacle of Croke Park under floodlights. Booking is essential and patrons are advised to wrap up warmly.


Further information and booking:
Tickets €8 (adult); €6 (concession); €4 (child);
€20 (family)
Further information available from Selina O’ Regan
Education Officer at the GAA Museum Tel (01) 8192361/8192323
Email soregan@crokepark.ie or visit www.gaa.ie/museum

 

 

 

The Real All-Stars.

 

By Eugene McGee.
 

........................................................................
MOST GAA people will have, over the past two months, attended some sort
of awards function.

The GAA is a great organisation for awards, from man of the match
prizes in under-10 games all the way up to the pinnacle of the
business, an All-Star award and the chance to meet Marty Morrissey.
In fact, there are so many awards available to GAA players that you
would want to be a really poor player not to collect enough trophies to
line your mantelpiece during your career, no matter what level you
compete at.

And even if you can't kick a ball or swing a hurley, you can still pick
up an award for Club Person of the Year or Supporter of the Year.
I suppose, it is all fairly harmless stuff and it gives a lot of
employment to trophy-makers around the country.

But it occurs to me that there is a small army of people in the GAA,
without whose efforts the organisation would probably collapse, yet
they are hardly ever considered for awards.

Their problem is that they are taken for granted. Indeed, most people
never even stop to think about the level of commitment these people put
in on a totally voluntary basis.

For example, all over Ireland on dark, wet, frosty winter nights
between October and March, hundreds of young men travel from third
level colleges back to their native parishes or counties to take part
in team preparations.

They usually leave their college base in the late afternoons, travel
for a couple of hours at least, do their training, grab a bite to eat
if they are lucky, and dash back across the country to their digs. The
whole escapade would probably average at least six hours and can take
place a couple of times a week.

People who normally spend their evenings reclining in an armchair at
home, watching television, playing scrabble or surfing the internet
never even think about the effort these players make for the love of
parish or county.

Anybody who has occasion to travel Irish roads on winter nights will
testify to the strain involved in negotiating our ever-increasing
traffic mayhem.

Most of these young men do not have cars of their own and this means
that other unsung heroes have to step forward. These are dedicated
volunteers from the home parish who will travel to the third level
college, pick up the student player and repeat the process in reverse
after the training session.

Neither the students nor the drivers ever seem to feature when major
GAA awards are handed out at club or county functions.

Nor do another category of GAA people - the ones who look after the
various training grounds and make sure that they are warm and user-
friendly when the players arrive on winter nights. These people are
cleaners, caterers, night watchmen, confessors and DIY experts all
rolled into one.

They do this work unnoticed and unsung and only attract attention on
the very rare occasion when they get a date wrong and players arrive
for training to find the dressingrooms locked up and the showers not
turned on. Then, all hell breaks loose!

Then, of course, we have the committee people. Like all sports bodies,
the GAA has an army of people who spend a lot of their lives attending
meetings.

A small percentage of these masochists do become famous as county board
chairmen or secretaries, or even make it to Croke Park or onto
provincial council committees and thereby get some recognition. But the
vast majority of committee people remain anonymous to the average GAA
follower.

These men - and women nowadays - attend meetings once or twice a week
to do the mundane things that the average GAA person would never even
think about.

Making fixtures, appointing referees, allocating pitches and dealing
with referees' reports may not sound desperately important, but if
thousands of GAA committee people did not carry out these functions
every week of the year, the GAA would collapse.

Yet, hardly any of these dedicated people are in line for awards when
the celebratory functions are held every season.

The same goes for the many parents who make themselves available week
after week to drive their own and other children to training and
matches.

This is a service which really is at the very heart of the GAA, but the
work done by these people often goes totally unacknowledged.

Some will say that parents have a duty to ferry their children around
the county, but while that view may have prevailed 30 years ago, it
certainly does not today with many parents.

Indeed, many modern parents regard underage GAA activity as a free
child-minding service for a couple of hours and are not prepared to
help out themselves.

Therefore, the minority of parents who do offer their services have
become real heroes at local level as far as hard-pressed GAA clubs are
concerned.

 
Younger players are hugely influenced by the attitude of their own

parents. If they are constantly criticising players for the amount of
time they 'waste' at football or hurling, it has a negative impact on
that player. If parents are very supportive, it gives a player great
confidence.

Many family members are unsung heroes also because of the sacrifices
they make to facilitate other family members who are involved in GAA
activities. Often they assume some of the work responsibilities of the
player, particularly in farming or family businesses.

There are so many awards available to GAA players, you would want to be
a really poor player not to collect enough trophies to line your
mantelpiece during your career.

Parents often do some of those infamous third level college runs on
winter nights. Parents often pay for injured players to be treated and
seek nothing in return.

So while the publicly acclaimed awards at this time of year are fair
enough, perhaps the GAA should re-assess the whole system. Because many
of the real heroes, of whom I have only mentioned a few here, are never
recognised, simply because they are not in the limelight and do not
wish to be.

 

A meeting of minds.

 

 

By Denis Walsh.
 ....................................................................................
It is often misrepresented, but sports psychology has found its feet in Gaelic games and is burying misconceptions.

Five days before the Leinster hurling final of 1996 the Wexford team were in session with Niamh Fitzpatrick, their sports psychologist. They had not won a Leinster final for 19 years and, though they had beaten Kilkenny in the first round, the accepted view of Wexford as chokers and losers was current and robust still.

Fitzpatrick never stood at the top of the room and talked at the players, the sessions were designed to be interactive. So she asked them all to give one reason Wexford would beat Offaly on Sunday and threw the question open to the floor.

The room was suddenly gripped in a chilling and paralysing silence. Not a word. Not even the suggestion that words could survive in this climate. Liam Griffin and the other members of the management team were sitting together and Fitzpatrick prayed that none of them would crack and say something. She caught Griffin’s eye and sensed that he grasped the importance of biting his tongue. The silence flooded from one minute into the next and then it hardened, from frost to ice. “And I thought,” says Fitzpatrick, “‘Oh Jaysus, I’ve blown it. They’re going to be deflated now.’” Eternity had already come and gone when one player finally spoke. Fitzpatrick reckoned it was five minutes since she had put the question but she couldn’t be sure; in the vacuum, conventional time had ceased to be.

One word borrowed another and before the session ended every member of the panel had made a contribution. Recorded on a flipchart at the top of the room were 30 reasons Wexford would beat Offaly. Neutrals outside that room were struggling to think of one. “If you were to paint that room a colour,” says Fitzpatrick, “it started off insipid green. It was kind of, ‘Aw, I don’t know — I’m feeling a bit sick.’ And it turned into a vivid, vibrant red to the point where Liam Dunne went home and said to his mother, ‘We decided today that we’re going to beat Offaly.’” By then Fitzpatrick had been working with the Wexford players for three months. She had encountered scepticism though not open resistance. They talked first before they danced.

Griffin and Fitzpatrick had presented the idea of sports psychology to the players in such a way that they believed it was their call; the reality was more complex and cunning.

“Griffin dealt with it the way you’d deal with a young horse terrified by a white bag on the road. You wouldn ’t push the horse — you’d gently cajole and find a way for the horse to believe that it was his idea to go past.” Griffin and Fitzpatrick were acutely aware that sports psychology had image problems, all of them founded on ignorance.

Three years earlier Derry had won their first All-Ireland football title, making no secret of their sports psychologist, Craig Mahony, but such openness was exceptional. Each team in the 1995 All-Ireland football final, Dublin and Tyrone, had used a sports psychologist — Tom Moriarty and John Kremer — though the counties would have been surprised if you knew and you wouldn’t have heard it from them. The Wexford players told nobody of Fitzpatrick’s role. Fitzpatrick told her parents and swore them to secrecy. On match days in Croke Park she was identified to the relevant authorities as a physio.

One night, when members of the media turned up at training, Griffin told her to go over and rub one of Larry Murphy’s legs. In his victory speech from the Hogan Stand after Wexford won the All-Ireland final Martin Storey referred to Fitzpatrick as their “special friend” — like a character from a Charlie Lansborough song. Only later, in player interviews, did her presence leak out. The perceived need for secrecy was bound up with the general perception of sports psychologists and the whole idea of sports psychology. Why would you need it unless you had a serious weakness?

Why would you consider it unless you were desperate? How could you swallow such codology? Discretion was easier. “The players were working around the county,” says Fitzpatrick, “they were meeting people in the jobs they did. From that point of view it was a case of, ‘Don’t add something else into the equation.’ You don’t want people saying to them, ‘Ye’re a bunch of nancy boys, ye need to have some bird looking after ye’re heads,’ that sort of thing. And also we felt it was nobody ’s business. The only thing it might do is put further pressure on the athletes. “With the players I had to break it down. The first night I met them I went through what I would do. There wouldn’t be any chanting or tree hugging or talking to their inner child. It would be practical exercises that would train their minds in the way that Sean Collier would do practical exercises to train their bodies. I told them that just as you have physical skills such as speed and endurance and hurling ability you also have mental skills: the ability to concentrate, the ability to be confident, the ability to handle nerves. “When you spoke to these players the whole idea of going into Croke Park and beating Kilkenny . . . I may as well have said to them that we’ll walk up the wall like Spiderman. We had to say, ‘Just think that this may actually be possible.’” It was only one part of Wexford’s preparation but they couldn’t have won without it.

Whatever percentage it contributed to their performance was a percentage they didn’t have to spare. It meant that for the third time in four years an All-Ireland had been won with the involvement of a sports psychologist. It ought to have been a watershed; it wasn’t. It didn’t explode all the prejudices or refute the ignorance.

Galway’s hurlers had also used a sports psychologist that year, 1996, and when they were beaten in the All-Ireland semi-final the Galway hurling secretary, Phelim Murphy, publicly criticised the Galway manager, Mattie Murphy, for going down that road.

In the wider GAA community if people thought about sports psychology at all it was with suspicion. Quietly, though, a revolution has taken place. In the 10 years since Derry and Craig Mahony, elite GAA teams all over the country have embraced sports psychology. It continues to be a mostly furtive relationship with no holding hands in public, although some relationships have come out of the closet. This year the Fermanagh manager, Dominic Corrigan, openly referred to Brendan Hackett as the team’s psychologist. No inhibitions, no hang-ups.

In various capacities Hackett has been involved with inter-county teams since the mid-1980s but in recent years it has been his expertise in sports psychology that teams have sought. He says that in the past six years he has worked with 10 inter-county football teams, from one-off presentations to several sessions: Fermanagh, Laois, Louth, Longford, Cavan, Monaghan, Clare and others. Attitudes are changing. “A lot of counties are trying to dabble in it,” he says, “but some of them are still embarrassed by it. What I’ve found is that when you get down to working with the players it’s a completely open door. What I always say is that so much of sport psychology is common sense but not common practice.”

Dr John Kremer from Queen’s University has a similar phrase to counter the myths: “formalised common sense,” he calls it. Kremer moved from the Lake District in the north of England to Belfast in the early 1980s. His own sports background is in rugby but for 15 years he has been consistently involved in preparing Ulster football teams. When Dessie Ryan came home from New York and was asked to take charge of Queen’s Sigerson Cup team in the late 1980s one of the first questions he asked was: “Where’s the sports psychologist?”

The former Tyrone player Fergal Logan approached Kremer and from there it took off. When Ryan, Art McRory and Eugene McKenna formed the Tyrone management team in the early 1990s, Kremer was included. Ryan didn’t stay long but whenever McRory and McKenna were in charge of Tyrone they had Kremer on board. This year he even helped the Tyrone county champions, Killyclogher, managed by the former Fermanagh player Peter McGinnity. His contact with teams is not always direct.

This summer, after Donegal bottomed out against Fermanagh in the first round of the Ulster championship, the Donegal manager, Brian McEniff, got in touch. As the summer went on the contact became more frequent. McEniff would bounce ideas off him and look for feedback. When Donegal’s summer became a good news story he name-checked Kremer in public and already they’ve been discussing next season. Players he has worked with in Queen’s and elsewhere still get in touch occasionally for help but, ideally, he doesn’t see the role of a sports psychologist as a crutch or a counsellor. “Once you’ve had the intervention with a player early in his career the message should always be there. After that you’ll only be repeating yourself. A happy end to an intervention is when the player says, ‘I don’t need you anymore. I ’m equipped to deal with it.’ “What you have to realise too is that a lot of people don’t need it. Sports psychologists shouldn’t be looking for work.” Nobody will be surprised to learn that Ulster football teams seem to have embraced sports psychology more warmly than teams in any other province. Preparation for football in Ulster has an intensity that offers sports science laboratory conditions.

Antrim collared Kremer a couple of years ago after Tyrone were beaten in the championship and this year he reckons four Ulster teams had contact with sports psychology. Last year in Armagh Joe Kernan enlisted the help of Hugh Campbell and Des Jennings, variously described as psychologists and team builders. Mickey Harte used them too when he was in charge of the Tyrone minors in the late 1990s.

This year Tyrone didn’t have a sports psychologist but it is clear from Harte’s diary of the season that he leant heavily on sports psychology — sourced, borrowed and applied. Smart managers have never been afraid of it. When John O’Mahony was manager of Mayo and later Leitrim he exposed the players to an occupational psychologist, a Scot who had worked with Digital in Galway. In later years with Galway he quietly used sports psychologists as part of his holistic package. Under O’Mahony Leitrim won their first Connacht title in 67 years; Galway won their first All-Ireland in 32 years. Did it help? Could it have hurt? Barriers to acceptance still exist and not just in the GAA’s little parish. In his new book, Sport and Exercise Psychology: A Critical Introduction, Professor Aidan Moran of UCD quotes a survey by BBC radio six years ago. Forty-four professional soccer clubs in the UK were asked if they had ever used a sports psychologist and three quarters of them said they hadn’t; some said they would never even consider it.

In individual sports, however, the picture is much different. Moran has worked with Padraig Harrington in the past and on the major golf tours sports psychologists are as common as physios now. Davis Love III, one of the best players in the world, is reported to have a roster of three sports psychologists. “The biggest problem,” says Moran, “is the mis-identification of sports psychologists as faith healers or spoon benders, like an Eileen Drewery or a Uri Geller.”

The fight to educate goes on and they’re winning. A manager whose team reached the semi-finals of the hurling championship sought Moran’s assistance during the summer and this week another letter arrived on his desk from an enlightened county board. No names. Not yet. Relaxed transparency is coming. But slowly.
_________________


 

 

 

 

 

Polish Divorce

 

A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl.

Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him.

The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

Have you any grounds?

Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.

No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?

It’s made of concrete.

I don't think you understand. Does either of you have a real grudge? No, we have carport, and not need one.

I mean. What are your relations like?

All my relations still in Poland.

Is there any infidelity in your marriage?

We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.

Does your wife beat you up?

No, I always up before her.

Is your wife a nagger?

No, she white.

Why do you want this divorce?

She going to kill me.

What makes you think that?

I got proof.

What kind of proof?

She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom.

I can read, and it say: 'Polish Remover'.

IAN PAISLEY GOES TO HEAVEN

Paisley died and went to heaven. When he got there he knocked long and hard on the pearly gates. St.Peter came out and asked his name.

YOU DON'T KNOW MY NAME ? I'M THE REV. IAN PAISLEY He roared at St. Peter. St. Peter looked at his list and could not find his name. Sorry said St. Peter you're not on the list.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M NOT ON THE LIST??? DO YOU NOT KNOW WHO I AM? As a matter of fact I do, said St. Peter, but your name is not on the list, THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH I'M A VERY IMPORTANT PERSON MY NAME SHOULD BE ON THE LIST. St. Peter tried to explain that it's not easy to get into heaven, that you have to be a Catholic. When Paisley hears this he starts to complain. So St. Peter says that had he had been good to Catholics he would have some chance
.

WELL, roared Paisley, I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I HAVE BEEN VERY GOOD TO CATHOLICS, WHY ONLY TWO WEEKS AGO I MET A YOUNG GIRL WHO HAD MADE HER COMMUNION AND I GAVE HER A POUND AND TWO WEEKS BEFORE I MET A YOUNG BOY WHO HAD MADE HIS COMMUNION AND I HAVE HIM A POUND, NOW WHAT DO YOU SAY NOW MR. ST. PETER!

St. Peter took a few notes on what he said. He told Paisley to wait that he would have to go and talk to GOD and get some advice. About ten minutes later St. Peter come out and said to Paisley, HERE'S YOUR TWO POUNDS BACK, NOW Feck OFF.

 

 

GAA Quotes

“A good umpire is better than a good corner forward”. Pat Buckley

'They had the hurling, and they had the heart. But why wouldn't they, it's bred into them with their mother's milk!' - Fan Larkin on hurling heritage in James Stephens.

'
They (UCD) shouldn't be in it. I didn't want to say it beforehand, but it's a f**king joke, and if the Dublin clubs don't kick up, they're harmless men. Next year, are we going to have WIT in it as well, UCC too perhaps.' - Philly Larkin, doesn't hold back.

'
Up to last year, the county championship wasn't just a monkey on their backs, it was Planet of the Apes.' -Diarmuid O'Flynn on the Leinster and Kilkenny champions, James Stephens.

'It gives me no pleasure to see Offaly losing by that margin at Croke Park or anywhere else. All of us involved in the game love hurling and we're interested in the game's welfare. Offaly were All-Ireland champions in 1998, they were in the final in 2000. The respect we have for Offaly is born out of many years of suffering at their hands over the last 30 years.' - Kilkenny manager Brian Cody on the Offaly side that suffered a 31-point mauling at the hands of the Cats.

 

Eric Thorpe, Senior Sarsfields Official  goes on Holiday with Moorefield!

Rumours of his Defection Rife.

Eric Thorpe, confidant of the Taoiseach, the man who knows everybody, who recently appointed himself to the new senior management set up and who also is chief of security for the club, and who has publicly stated that he may appoint himself as club chairman in the future, caused a major stir by jetting off to lanzarote at the weekend with the Moorefield team and supporters for a week in the sun.

In view of Eric’s senior position within the Sarsfields club eyebrows were raised and rumours were rife that he had defected to Moorefield when the news broke at the weekend. A senior club official who did not wish to be named was giving little away, when asked if there would be disciplinary proceedings taken against Eric over his apparent divided loyalties or worse his defection, said, “We will have to debrief him when he returns before making a decision. Obviously in view of his senior position within the club this is potentially a serious disciplinary matter. There is no precedent for this. Eric is privy to the inner workings of the Senior set up so we will have to determine if he passed on any sensitive information to the Moors while indulging in cocktails binges at the poolside hotel with our arch enemy. The official added that the worry would be that apart from the alcohol and the heat that the normally reticent Eric might be become extremely voluble and turn into a hormone raging lothario if the Moors set up Eric in a honey trap, perhaps employing the use of a listening device in the seductresses bra as she wooed and massaged Eric at the poolside while the Moors executive committee listened in nearby hoping to catch one of our top officials in a compromising position on the sunbed as well as get some idea of Sarsfields plans for 2008. “We shudder to think what was said and done during the poolside frolics between Eric and the Moorefield planted seductress and masseur but we can only wait until Eric returns to get his side of the story to be fair”, the senior colleague of Eric’s added.

“Zo Eric tell me about ze fuutball team zat you are ze manager of, says the seductress as she bends over preparing to give Eric an all over body massage on his lilywhite body. “Well, I’m not the manager, but I’m second in command to the new manager”, says Eric who is not one to exaggerate or inflate his own importance. “ I’m what you would call the senior strategist for the team”, says Eric as he reaches down for his umbrella cocktail ala Del boy while puffing on a fat Cuban cigar. “Zat seems like a very important work zat you do”, says the seductress as she rubs oil into her palms. Behind a nearby hedge Tango Dooley is fiddling with the monitoring equipment. “Shush, he says to Paul Dempsey, I think we’re getting something here.

“Zo Eric you have been a fuutbal player too. No”? “How my beautiful Spanish petal did you know that”, says Eric beaming. “Oh zat it is easy”, says the seductress. “You have, how is it said in the eenglish? You have ze definition in ze muscles. It is ze sign of a real athletico”. “Well I was a great footballer for many years, says Eric modestly. “And now you are great strategist, because you played so well on ze field no?” “Yes and I have more experience and senior medals that all of the team put together”. “Zo you still do the training no”? “I can run like a greyhound so I appointed myself trainer to the senior team. I don’t just train them I train with them. I wouldn’t ask any of my lads to do something that I couldn’t do myself after all I’m a role model for all the players”.

“Zo you hav ze plans in place for dealing with ze other fuutbal teams in ze new season”. “I have”, says Eric in slightly higher pitched voic, e as the seductresses’ hands move slowly downwards. “Zo Eric is this fuutbal league like La Liga where ze have ze big local matches between ze big local teams like Real Madrid and Athletico Madrid. “Yes, yes we have zat too, I mean that too”, says Eric beguiled by her accent as he begins to wonder where her hands are now, unable to look, mesmerised as he is by the seductresses sultry voice, forgetting about everything even his beloved greyhounds as she stares intently and passionately into Eric’s eyes while Eric begins to drool like one of his greyhounds after a hard workout. “Zo Eric zell me about ze local team zat you do battle with every year in ze Newbridge City.” “Well they are called Moorefield and they are our biggest rivals. Actually I’m here with them this week.” “Vat, I no understand. Ze are here? Impossible! Why would you be with ze enemy here”, says the seductress acting her part like a great actress on stage. “Well I’m here to keep my ears open. I’m doing a bit of undercover work so to speak”, says Eric wondering why the masseur is no longer massaging him. “Zo you are a how you sey in the eenglish, a spy.” “Well let’s say I’m an observer,” says Eric with an enigmatic smile on his face. Tango curses from behind the hedge and whispers to Paul Dempsey, “ we’ll get f**k all out of him now. He’s getting no more effin drinks from us, the Sarsfields b******s. Between the drinks, the masseur and the recording equipment this is costing the club a small fortune. We’ll have to sell a lot more Euro Buster tickets next week to pay for this. On top of that we have the Leinster Council fine coming up and Banjo – the new Moorefield Health and Safety Officer - wants to buy a few new fluorescent signs for the clubhouse so that we can see in the dark in case the ESB cut us off which is likely seeing what the previous Health and Safety Officer is going to cost us after the fiasco in Mullingar. Jesus at this rate we’ll have to go to St Vincent De Paul for jerseys this year.”

Eric smiles to himself. “If you would like to hear more about my strategy my beautiful seniorita we can meet up tonight”, he says to the seductress. The seductress however has suddenly become surly, her smile eclipsed by her mood as she realises that Eric wouldn’t be giving any information away.  She wonders whether the idiot playing at spying behind the hedge and who uses the name of a well known dance as his code name- madre di dios, does he think that he is in James Bond - will pay her for her services. Well if not she thinks, the smile slowly returning maybe she would switch sides and do a Tango with Eric instead. 

The Top 10 GAA cock-ups

1.      The point that was. In the 1967 Leinster final between Kildare and Meath, Kildare, trailing by a point are awarded a 21 yard free with the referee John Dowling from Offaly indicating that it will be the last kick of the game. As the ball sails between the posts to give Kildare a replay referee Dowling blows for full time and Meath win Leinster and go on to win the All Ireland.

2.      The 'point' that never was (1995 Leinster football tie) : Laois' Mick Turley kicked the  ball over his head with 42 seconds remaining and the ball was deemed to have gone over the Carlow bar. But video evidence showed that it had gone wide. Laois won by a point. Laois later offered Carlow a replay and won in the re-fixture.

3.      Kerry's 'goal' against Tipp (1999 Munster football c'ship) : After just eight minutes Kerry corner-forward Gerry Murphy kicked the ball wide but it came back into play off a stanchion and the Rathmore player finished the rebound to the net. Kerry won by 6 points and Tipp were not awarded a replay.

4.      Six sent off (1999 Leinster tie) : With the introduction of new rules, ref Niall Barrett of Cork dished out 14 yellow cards and sent off six players, four from Carlow. Westmeath won by four points.

5.      GPA 'Player of the Year' (2001) : After initially awarding and informing Padraig Joyce both verbally and in writing that he had won their award, on the night of the presentation he is playing for Connacht in the Railway Cup in Killarney and cannot attend. But at the ceremony it is announced that Declan Meehan won the award.

6.      Jimmy Cooney's 'lost minutes' (1998 All-Ireland hurling semi-final) : With Clare hanging on to a three point lead against Offaly, Galway ref Jimmy Cooney blows for full-time with over two minutes of play remaining. By the time he realised his mistake, stewards were leading him from the field. Hundreds of Offaly fans sat in protest on the field. The Kerry U-21 hurlers were due to play Kildare after but couldn't proceed. The Senior game  went to a replay, which Offaly won.

7.      Cork minor's two yellows (2000 minor semi) : Midfielder Kieran Murphy received two yellow cards from Roscommon ref Gerry Kinneavy but wasn't ordered off. Cork held on by a point and Derry's appeal for a rematch was turned down.

8.      Alcohol Sponsorship :  In pre-Guinness hurling championship times the Central Council voted against accepting financial backing from the drinks Industry at a behind closed doors meeting. It subsequently emerged that the vote was tied and it was former and the then GAA President Peter Quinn which decided the issue.

9.      Wrong team won (Connacht minor final 1989) : In the dying seconds of the game, Roscommon who are trailing Galway by a point, are awarder a penalty. Shane Curran sprints forward and drives the kick to the net. The whistle blows and Roscommon assume they have won and are presented with the cup. But it subsequently emerges that the ref disallowed the goal from the penalty and Galway are declared the official winners. Galway agree to a replay but lose.

10.  No show for extra-time (1987 NFL QF) : Dublin and Cork finish level at the end of normal time. Cork retire to their dressing room and fail to re-appear for the E T. The match was restarted with Dublin facing no opposition. While the Cork players are on their bus, Barney Rock scores the easiest game of his career to put Dublin through. Cork's protests are turned down and Dublin go on to win the League.

 

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